The 1-Man Keg Stand

Kids don't try this at home. The 1-man keg stand is no easy feat. Slip and you may crack your skull open....succeed and you may be immortalized into the history books forever as one of the brave drunken few.
From all accounts the first one Man keg stand was originated in the downstairs Adamic guest bathroom after our soccer team lost state somewhere around 1997'. The beauty of the 1-man is that it's not for show. I stumbled upon Adrock ...alone in the bathroom....giving himself a keg stand...because he wanted one and no one was there to hold his feet. He did it not for glory, rather to satisfy a desire, a desire to take it to the next level even when nobody is watching, a desire that separates the true champions from the simply lucky ones.
It's kind of a lot like why we do the Lenexa BBQ every year. We do it because we want to push ourselves. Not because anybody is going to give us recognition for it. We do it because it's a challenge. The point is no one remembers losing state, we only remember the keg stands.

Cake On Our Face

THE RESULTS ARE IN!!

173) 143 161 HALF BAKED HOGS 123.4286 136.0002 128.5714 141.7144

120) 144 SMOKIN ON CLOUD 9 156.0000 141.7142 142.2862 145.1428

What the hell does all that mean? We took 173rd place. Obviously we missed it by 12 spots. But come on who had a good time? I know I sure did. 173rd isn't bad...it's not great....but it's not...great. Cloud 9 was only 20 away from cracking the top 100. Way to go.

I guarantee though everybody knows who the guys with the wii bowling tournament at 2:00am were. I guarantee it...like that guy who sells suits or whatever.

So what have we learned here ... Don't pass out first mainly ;)

EPIC TIMES

Well here is a picture of the Hogs after we finally got things set up. We threw the best party as usual, and Smokin on Cloud 9 won a Ribbon too. I'm working on the video and the content management. I took over 600 pics and a couple hours of video so give me some time to pull it all together. It's Sunday and after a weekend like that...I need some rest....

For My Comrades

Kaun to party with 161

For those who live in the KC Metro area. Jason King will have Sasha and Rodrick at the Lenexa BBQ for an autograph session from 6-9pm tomorrow night. Go eat, drink and hang out with Champs.Also, there is a signing on Saturday at Oak Park Mall.Lenexa BBQ and Oak Park MallSASHA KAUN AND RODRICK STEWARTFriday, June 27 6-9 pm Lenexa BBQ87th Street Parkway and Lackman RoadLenexa, Kansas

http://www.kubook.net/

note if you see Lodrick Stewart, do not talk shit, if you have any questions ask Mike at Freightquote.

The new knives

Gents compliments of Bradco Supply. I present to you.. Our newest members.. The Knives.. Can you see it.. The blade glows when orcs are near..

Fridays Weather...

Looks like we are going to be getting wet.

Your Weekley 161 find

Getting those bar-b-q bills payed and found this gem on my last one. So This reminds me of a story about my grandma I'm going to share. I don't know why I remember this but I do and it's from early childhood. I guess back in the day there was a certain amount of credibility that was connected to the number of checks you have written. (ex. you don't trust someone who is check #001) There probably still is some stigma . But anyway I think it's a lost thing in this ATM debit card world. So anyway My grandma had written (she 8 kids btw) literally tens of thousands of checks over her lifetime. I remember being at her house when the bank sent her new checks because she went over 20,000 and they started over with check #101. She flew off the handle because she thought she had lost all credibility. So recently I ordered new checks and this happened to me too and in the back of my head I cursed the banks in the name of Grandma but kept on using them b/c who writes checks anymore. But there she was in al her glory sixty one checks later. Your weekly 161 find.

Site Map 2008

Trust me you won't be able to miss us. 143 - 144

Click to enlarge

BBQ... Somebody here ask for Sauce

Thats right.. What is a good BBQ without the liquid Zeus Past down to Hera for the first BBQ documented in time... I say nothing.. Well fellas here it is.. Competition style sauce.. Hope you can all handle it..

Remembering Daytona

Its been awhile and I feel like I need to see the track again soon. This is a reminder to all those that missed how big Vegas will be.. Enjoy the clip.

Sex and Drugs and House

The music around here just got a whole lot better (except to Weber's ears) and I just wanted to see how this worked, so now I got it figured out, and I'll get us a huge set list going. If you want to create your own playlist go to http://www.playlist.com/ and sign up it's like photobucket for music. all the music is already there. Make a playlist, get the code and send it my way I'll be happy to spin you for awhile or mesh them into super playlist. You can also add these to your Myspace if your still living in 06'.

Enjoy - and I hope you like Coldplay ... haha

seriously if you have request let me know in comments.

Your Weekly 161 Find...

This weeks 161 was found off 161st st in Olathe. And on a side note I checked my yahoo email today and had 161 new messages!

Boats Docked Again!

ahhhhhhhh! Will we ever get to play!!! Boats as your captain I am sad to say we are not scheduled to play again this week. I would have know this if I would have looked at the schedule earlier but I guess because we are a 6 team league so they give us a couple off days.

But we haven't even played yet and we won't now till July. There is a chance that they might put us on because of rain outs but nobody has said that to me yet and since the Lenexa Bar-B-Q is this week anyway I'm not going to make a point about it. Sorry Boats....one more week.

Oh and our next game, FIRST GAME is at 10:30 July 3rd so if you can't make it let me know. Also please visit this site for our future schedule. (we are like the middle tab)


http://www.kcusssa.com/KO'S%20Stuff%202008/Thursday_MASC_SU_08.htm

Word has Spread

A buddy of mine in Wisconsin snapped this photo and sent it our way. He's a Packers Fan but at least he's looking out for the Mafia.

The first CO's of the Summer felt so damn good. I think everyone is screwed come forth of July. Now that I have video I have been studying my technique and I will bring home the gold.

BBQ t-minus 3 days. My mouth is already watering.

CB's, CO's, JK's and the 4th of July

If you don't know what a CB is well...I feel sorry for ya. See ya on the spring board suckers!

Hot Chick Stoner BBQ

Although I cant claim that I have actually watched this video.. I couldnt help but laugh at the contents and thought that this had to be material made for The Half Baked Hogs. This is a guide to the art of barbequeing that you won’t want to miss! The lovely Hot Rod Honey imparts all her secrets, joined by her hot stoner friends in some meat-grilling, gun-shooting, whiskey-drinking, pot-smoking action. Honey will teach you how to perfectly prepare ribs, steaks, corn on the cob, mushrooms, and hot peppers, as well as the ins and outs of the consummate marinade and of course, meat rubs.

The first season was so good, they decided to make a sequel..


FOR ALL YOU NETFLIXERS....

Elbow Licking - Can you do it?

Dayday writes in with an interesting question:

KC,I don't believe that you can lick your elbow, however, I read this and thought perhaps there is hope....
Elbow Licking

This is from Guinness World Records: "Elbow Licking. Contrary to popular urban legend, it is quite possible to lick your own elbow. Guinness World Records receives about five claims a day for this and stresses the following point: Being able to lick your own elbow is not, in any sense, a world record. If you're one of the rare few who can lick your elbow, save it for the water cooler."

So....you can feel free to prove me wrong tonight...in the meantime see why it is impossible below. Notice the awesomeness of my technique that still lead me to no success.

Rocky Bow B's Pledge

Fellas.... I solemnly swear to pull an all nighter, im talking the whole night, and nothing but the all nighter.. There will be no side door exits to the house. We have come this far and I think it is great that we have got drunk the past 4-5 saturdays to make sure that we are competition ready. Hence day drinking and smoking. As you can see the little one has taken my spot and has made sure to keep her warm till saturday night. NO beds, if i get the grass infront of the tent and the paramedics have to come again, then I know we did and are doing something right. My early depature was girl scout status last year and want all to know by no means will I be getting a ticket to ride. This post was not meant for comments to say weak from last year, but SO HUGE for this year. Gents... Were almost there. Lets feed these fat asses the choicest meats, and let the fragle tooth hangouts enjoy the sights of our women... TO THE DAYS OF OUR LIVES>>

M.I.A.

For those of you that recognize this face but can't quite put a name to the face.............Its Anthony Joseph Francisco, that guy we were all friends with in college, but haven't seen or heard from in a while. Well it seems that he is being a raging Chad and will not grace us with his presence at this years Lenexa BBQ, due to some "work" issues. I don't know about you but the Tony I remember being friends with never would have sold out his friends for a J-O-B! It seems to me the only way to change the stars is to create something out of nothing. So for those of you who wish to have Antoine "cowboy the fuck up" please feel free to express yourself in a message to Anthony at franciscoanthony@gmail.com and explain in 50 words or less why you feel he is being a "Zach Sight!"

Group Wants Pot Allowed in Airport Smoking Lounges

Denver-based organization says pot is safer than alcohol

Last Edited: Tuesday, 24 Jun 2008, 6:06 AM MDT

Created: Tuesday, 24 Jun 2008, 5:58 AM MDT

Denver International Airport National Institutes of Health Marijuan Info DENVER (MyFOXColorado.com) - One pro-marijuana group is calling on the government to allow marijuana in smoking lounges at airports across the country. Cigarette smoking at Denver International Airport and other airports across the country is restricted to smoking lounges. Members of the Denver-based organization Safer Alternative for Enjoyable Recreation (SAFER) will ask the government Tuesday to allow pot in airport smoking lounges. The group says in a press release that the idea will address the growing number of in-flight problems involving drunk and disorderly passengers. Members claim marijuana is a better alternative to alcohol to help more fliers relax and deal with the anxiety of air travel.

Message From Doozie

My friends and my family,

After a thrilling and eye-opening stay in SE Asia, I returned to Melbourne feeling like everything was moving faster. I felt anxious and knew I needed yet another change of venue. After a brief stay on the coach of a friend, I chose a place on the east coast of Oz and flew there. This not long after watching my beloved Jayhawks cut down the nets at the casino with a couple of others clad in crimson and blue on a sunny, tuesday morning.
My first stop was Byron Bay, home of some of the most beautiful beaches in Oz and a funny mix of hippies and surfers. I would not consider myself either but I can relate to both. Within a few days there, I developed some good friendships with some fascinating people. A fella named Sage even cleansed my aura. Sage was an odd character, but he was never short of interesting things to say.
Another bloke, Bob, sounded exactly like Dude Lebowski in every way. Every statement that left his mouth, ended in the word 'man'. He was pushing 55 with long, silvery hair. Probably the most laid back guy I'd ever met-- we became buddies instantly.
I got some much needed TLC from my cousins and auntie in another beach town called Noosa. A few brilliant days with them and another surf lesson and I was on my way further up the coast. After a mere 17 hour bus ride, I unfolded myself in a town called Airlie Beach, where I write to you now. It's the gateway to the Whitsunday Islands in the Great Barrier Reef. Beautiful spot with an unattractive, hugely backpacker populated down side. That being said, I've got a good job with some wild people.
My boss is a former English rockstar. He has a warrant for execution should he ever set foot back in to Qatar and is afraid of balloons. First time I came up to his home, he put on some Sex Pistols and in mid-conversation he exclaimed 'i f@cking love this track!!' and started throwing anything he could get his hands on over the balcony--windchimes, plates, wine glasses..you name it. He then sat down and continued his intelligent conversation where he left off. I've never laughed so hard in my entire life. He lives his life with a youthful vigor that in no way correlates with the number of candles he blew out on his last birthday cake, 37. I've learned a lot from him.
My other partner in crime behind the bar is Will, yet another English gentleman. Will talks like C3PO from Star Wars and kind of looks like him, now that I think about it. He uses 16 words when 3 will do. 'Poppycock' and 'balderdash' are a few of his favorite expressions. He'll say things like 'your prowess behind the bar is unmatched by most I've come across in my many days since birth'. A simple 'nice going, chief' and I would have picked up his message saving us both time. Sometimes I get the urge to slap him senseless, but in my ongoing quest to find the good in people, I now call him my friend. However, sometimes when he carries on with things like, 'a thousands thanks yous, madame' it still to this day tests my patience. You poured her a glass of wine and she gave you 5 bucks for it, I think one thank you will do fine, mate.
One more colleague. His name is Phil. Phil Collins. Hahahahahaha, still cant believe that one.
That's about it. Got about a month left before heading to the other side of the country for my last stop. Gonna try and save to pop over to Indonesia. Before I head that way, my buddies and I have rented a yacht for 5 days. We'll be able to cruise all around the islands in the Barrier Reef, stopping to snorkel, bbq, swim wherever we like, whenever we like. I'm looking forward to that greatly.
Mullets everywhere. Still.
Seen lots of fellas wearing Pantera shirts lately, they making a comeback? What gives?
My time away is drawing to a close. I look forward to seeing you all so much. I'm not sure where my head will be at in terms of my life plan when I return. But, I do know that seeing you all again is something I look forward to already. As always, I hope this email finds you all in good spirits with life treating you fairly and gently.

Best,
dooz

p.s. As always, I love getting emails from each and every one of you. Trully, it means a lot. A thousand thank yous to all who have remained in touch.

V for Veccio... FOR VICTORY

Well if you havent been with us for awhile i apologize.. Hear is something we have been working on. Great way to save space on the smoker and allows both sides to get a bunch of smoke. Sneak peaks are free the next one will cost ya.

Ribs Ribs Ribs

just giving the sauce a quick burn.

Links deaths and Euros

As you probably heard George Carlin died late last night, the good news is Clark did not have him in the death pool.

This is a BBQ website isn't it.

I've gotten a lot of shit about watching Euro 2008, well if you can't get behind that, here is something you can behind. (last one nsfw)

A virginia man lost 80 pounds by eating nearly every meal at Mcdonalds, proving even more so that Subway's Jared is a stupid asshole.

Here is an article from the beginning of the year about Joakim Soria or as he's now known, Buenos Noches.

Finally, I assume you all know about this website http://www.pandora.com/ but just in case you don't, it is a fun way to pass the time at work.

Ribs moving along

Saturday was good, high fives all around.. Here is a sneak peak of the goods... Glad we found this sytle. Cant wait to hold that trophy hogs... Later.

That depends on which plane of reality the chicken was on at the time.

I always said life is about break down laughter, with you and your friends, on the kitchen floor ... with one hand on your cell phone and the other on a baster.

We are not sure which side of the road the chicken was on, but it was moving very fast.

Sneak Peek: Brisket Video

The juices...were so good all over my face and hands...It was just dripping with delight

Your Weekly 161 Find...

This picture was taken off a Bowling Trophy that I have in my personal collection. It is a regular season AND post season 08 trophy for FIRST PLACE! Our team was "Team 161" and we were very powerful. No other team, of the 20 or 25 others out there, could hang with our amazing Spares and Strikes! With the Captain as our Anchor, Darby with his consistency, Weber with his powerful spin, and our secret weapon of Bick with the backhanded tosses. Will any team ever be able to de-thrown "Team 161"?

Whatcha know about that rib roll

Well here it is.. Mamba has been requesting we do what we here in the midwest like to call the rib roll. Thats right the rib roll, for all you rib enthusiast out there that dont know there ass from there elbows.. sit back relax and watch the hogs pass... There was an ancient proverb that placing cheese in the center of the roll would create a mythical smoke that would billow from below causing a volcaninc smoke to spew from the deep dark. Please rooks.. do not try this at home..

Daily Keg Stand

Here we are again. And with none other then Nied herself...in perfect form mind you. Great arm and leg extension. Hair brushed all to one side for easy pump access. Truly a professional pulled off the street and putting on a clinic for a house full of young rookies. Pay heed to Nied ladies...she's the one to beat.

Happy Friday ;)

Last BBQ B4 Competition

Hogs... This is it. Tomorrow is the last practice slash day drinking slash cheese festing we have till the official 2008 Lenexa BBQ. Can we get a toll of who is bringing what. I know Mamba wont be there till a little later so if Fred and KC can come by around noon we should be golden. I was going to do 2 slabs of ribs and probably 2 small chicken boys. Fred and Culp either of you want to do a brisket? We are trying a few new things with the ribs.. I think we have conquered the brisket but always love throwing one out there to feast on.. Well Let me know.. and happy Friday..

IT all Starts now

Summer begins on June 20th in 2008 in the Northern Hemisphere. The seasons are considered by some Western countries to start at the equinoxes and solstices, based on astronomical reckoning. In North American-printed English-language calendars, based on astronomy, summer begins on June 20, the day of the summer solstice and ends on September 20, the autumn equinox. When it is summer in the Northern Hemisphere, it is winter in the Southern Hemisphere, and vice versa.

Nothing says Hello Summer like a little BBQ and some sweat on the brow.

Wino in hospital, Captain celebrates.

Amy Winehouse might have to ditch two huge gigs because docs are still trying to figure out what's ailing Amy. The wrecktabulous Brit is still in the hospital in London after collapsing Monday, and her rep says she's being given "additional scans and tests" to determine just exactly what happened. Aimers is supposed to play next weekend for Nelson Mandela's 90th birthday, and then the next day at the big Glastonbury festival. Both dates are still on, say her peeps. Wino crack restricts the blood vessels running to the heart causing the lack of blood flow. which is a common cause of death among crack heads. Puff puff keep, captain needs his first death in deathpool 08.

Storm Clears - Boats Win!

Boats thanks for comming out last night and starting our run at a perfect season!

Boats 1-0

Motorboat Live Radar

Papa Cloud

Gents, this blog is strong to quite strong. Culp I expect nothing but the best from you and you have out done yourself.

FYI - My old man is in the hospital and is going to need a heart valve replacement surgery in the the next few days. It is not a major operation but a prayer or a raise of the glass for a quick and full recovery would be greatly appreciated.

P.S. Smokin on Cloud 9 feels honored to be a part of the Kansas City BAR-B-Q Mafia and we shall give it the RESPECT it deserves....

Daily Keg Stand

It's not us but it's good. a good stand is a good stand.

Mgmt

SWEEP AWAY THE CARDS

I know we're still 10 games out of first, but it always feels so good to sweep the Cardinals.

T-Minus 4 hours until Boats take the field............hopefully.

Field of Dreams

I started this blog a week ago with one goal in mind. Actually there were no goals it just hit me like a ton of bricks at adrocks bar-b-q....if you build it...they will come. I started our visitor counter 24hrs ago. one day ago. So I would say between us and our unique visitors we average 300 views a day. Not bad for a bunch of bar-b-q smokers. that's 2100 a week, 8400 a month, and 1000,800 a year.

We'll I've let the monkeys run the amusement park...and yes hours are erratic, and maintenance has suffered to some degree, but it doesn't matter, views are up and it adds a ton more content.

I will be working on the Mafia Family tree. Everyone will have a responsibility. Boss, under bosses, captains, enforcers, the works.

Laugh of the day.. Compliments to the Chubby girl.

Well I could not hold back... I dont know what I find funnier, the girl screaming for her life, or her mom laughing at her the whole time... Please enjoy link below... I sure know I did.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7qRvuoRS7nI&feature=related

Your Weekly 161 Find...

This 161 was found at Lake Quivera Golf Course. The 15th Hole, short Par 3. It was acquired and put into a personal collection. Please snap pics of any 161s you come across. Most of us don't have cameras on us 24/7 like the Culprit, but camera phones work perfectly as well.

Cancer Cure?

Lately there has been a rash of reports about the carcinogens present in overcooked meat. The burning fat and char on well grilled meat may indeed pose some sort of health risk it appears.

But never fear, scientists have discovered a way to possibly neutralize these harmful effects — drinking beer! Now that’s a sign if I ever saw one. I know I always have a beer in hand while manning the grill, for “safety reasons”. (You know, in case there’s a fire.) But now I have a higher purpose, it’s for my health.

QUOTE FROM DRUNK GUY... I TRIED TO CONVINCE THE COPS I WAS PISSING ON MYSELF CUASE I THOUGHT I NOTICED A SUNSPOT..

He was later beaten by cops.. video to follow..

Mascot - Furry Fetish

It's on sale for $1,573.00. No joke...it might even have an opening in the right place just in case you would end up at a Furry convention...on accident...with the costume on...or some sort of mafia hazing ritual for new contributors down the road. whatever.

Website Mascot Contest

Time has come for such a new, upstart and successful website to officially name a mascot. When I think of a mascot, I think of fat people without any athletic skill dressed up in costumes to make them stand out even more than there already do in a normal day of public life. Well since this is a site dedicated to the art, love, pride, and passion of roasting a fat hog it only makes since that the mascot should be a fat women dressed up like a pig, with a tail coming out the ass and if were lucking possible rolling in the mud. ENJOY are new mascot. Also big props to Mamba#3 for taking home this lovely lady and managing to take a picture.

MADE MEN

The Boats have all been allowed temporary MADE contribution rights, and Cloudy and Wessel of course too since he's the head of the other family. I'm also throwing Wessel in since he's got that journalism background. And baska too just because of her deep knowledge of the crew and because she's always smiling. Just remember boys (and girl) the pen is mightier then the sword and to use the blog wisely (learn it from the short video tutorials) and keep the funny comming.

Bar-b-q in....bar-b-q out....HBH4Life

Rib-Nibblin Tunes at Kemper

It's ribs and music this weekend at the American Royal.

see here for the line-up:

http://www.ribamerica.com/kansasCity.html